Researchers from Harvard University say that parents of obese children are guilty of abuse and neglect. They firmly believe that the children should be removed from their homes put into state care and “managed” properly. Are they that far removed from society to believe this malarkey? Do they not understand the times we live in, the difficulties of parenting or of being a child today. Do they not remember their history?
The majority of today’s parents are both working outside of the home. Children over the age of 10 are generally left at home under the care of a teenager or by themselves. Either way, they are not able to go outside to play as children of previous generations were. They aren’t working the farm, or tending the animals. Today’s children are stuck in their homes for hours each day. This is not from parental neglect or abuse.
It costs a lot just to make ends meet. Most families cannot afford day camps, summer schools and activities for their children. When an affordable alternative is available, it does not last until the work day is over. No employer will tolerate Mom or Dad coming in late or leaving early to drop off or pick up Junior every day for a week, a month or a summer.
Today’s children cannot go out to play, roam the neighborhood, ride a bike, or walk to the park or pool. It’s just not safe. Just ask Jaycee Duggard or any of the millions of children who have been stolen off of the streets, schools and parks. For their own safety, children are relegated to their homes behind locked doors.
Unattended children do not have someone to tell them they can’t eat the entire bag of chips or cookies. They don’t have Mom or Dad to tell them to turn off the television. They don’t have someone at home to encourage them to play. They are not being ignored nor mistreated. Mom and Dad most likely are calling and doing what they can, but that’s just it, they are doing all they can. And, Junior is still at home eating everything in the pantry out of boredom.
In poor families, food takes on a skewed importance. Money for food is hard to come by. Food, let’s face it, is terrifically expensive. Healthy food is even more costly. Unhealthy and fattening foods are cheap and readily available. Yes, there are programs such as WIC (Women, Infants & Children) but they stop at age 5. Food pantries are available, as well. However, fresh fruits and vegetables are hard to come by. School free lunches are only available on school days and not the weekends or summer. We also know that when a body is starved, or thinks it is starved, the body stores as much fat as it can to survive. So, these poor children are hit with a double whammy – unhealthy food and an irregular food supply.
Obese parents are at a disadvantage. They can have poor eating habits, through ignorance or circumstances, and / or poor self-esteem which they teach their children through example. If a parent does not know how to cook wholesome, healthy food their children will not learn to make good food choices. If a parent makes poor choices in their food, their children will learn to think that is normal. It’s not from neglect or abuse, but just life.
Taking children from their parents because society thinks it knows better only causes more harm to the child, the family, the community and society. Between 1870 and 1930, over 100,000 Native America children were forcibly removed from their homes and placed in government mandated schools and missions. They were punished for speaking their native languages and forced to learn English ways and Christianity. While this was done in the name of “good” and “benefitting the children” it was clearly abusive and clearly wrong. The effects to the children, the culture and communities are still apparent today. Rampant alcoholism, disconnection from society and self, violence and abuse are the results of the National Indian Child Welfare Act.
Legislating and mandating a behavior never works. Governmental interference and mandates are major steps into socialism. We cannot provide mandatory jobs, mandatory child care, mandatory food supplies to everyone with everyone getting an equal share. We cannot give up our rights to work, play, live, marry and have children as we wish even if that means some children are obese.
We can give each other helping hands. We can work with each other to lighten the loads. Take turns taking the kids to parks or to the pools. We can plant community gardens where families and communities can enjoy the evenings working and laughing together as they grow not only healthy vegetables, but healthy communities of friendships. We can walk together, play pick-up games, laugh and grow. We can donate food and time to community pantries. We can fight obesity in adults and children by friendship, understanding and sharing good food.
United we stand. Divided we fall. It’s not just about fighting a revolutionary war, but in everyday life. Staying together as families and communities makes us all stronger.
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